Thursday, January 28, 2016

1 EXTRA DAY TO HAVE FUN...

It was a long weekend for us here, extra 1 day! We didnt go anywhere instead tried some spring cleaning but manage to only clean up 2 rooms. Can you imagine that?

The LumineSkinn was launched last week on the internet. Hope its going to be as hot as DS Vidas Qu Puteh range!! Give it a try, its packed with a whole lot of goodness for an overall health and beauty booster. You can WhatsApp 013.2580765 to order before the promo price ends! You should really give #LumineSkinn a try, unlike any other health supplement or collagen drink found locally, LumineSkinn is more than just a combo of  health supplement and collagen drink - it truly is a fix for your overall well being!



We 'harvested' our tapioca, waited too long! Some have turned so hard! But it still tastes really smooooooooth!

And 6/2/16 will be Trishs birthday - cant wait to have some fun time!
So far so great..
Alhamdulillah..

Monday, January 25, 2016

The truth is..

No one likes it when people corrected them. Let alone criticized!
Its nothing weird really.
Well at 46, i chose to swallow and change if its true. That i need to change.
True its not easy. Youd feel a little sad, or worst, bruised after being criticized but if you want a better relationship, or go forward, or be a better person..
Then just change!

Im just tired of hypocrisy. Lies. Double standard. And i dont care about whether id lose friends who arent even friends to begin with, with the changes im making.

I would hate to lose the few true friends i have now, honestly i would be devastated. They are more than friends. They are my real sisters, my real family.

When i was still married, in one of my really really low times, my daughter wanted chocolate drink. At the time, we were staying at my late moms house. Well he owner of the Choco drink instructed me to buy back a whole new tub. Thats not the only sad moment, therere plenty. I dont have to list them all here.

I refuse to take anymore of these unpleasant experience at this stage of my life. Some things, like the "incongruent" existence of my Ex. Even his family......is something that cant be avoided. If hatred isnt so evil, i would hate sooooooo much, theyd just disappear from the earth. But, hatred takes a toll on our souls. I dont need anymore of this...im trying really trying to make good...i dont need bad vibes, bad people to ruin things. Bad people make me hate, i dont want to hate. So the best is, just stay away, meet or talk only when its necessary. Or else...we shall keep our distance..
Dont even dare bring DOSA up!

Absence makes the heart grows fonder, so they say..

Peace.



Saturday, January 23, 2016

Bukan nak ungkit2..

Sometimes, THINGS make you wonder..
Like what the hell have i done wrong?
Bila orang tolong, memang kita terhutang budi..
Sampai orang yang menolong boleh treat kita anyway they like?

And bila orang buat kita, memang kita kena diam saja kah
Dan biarkan tuhan uruskan segalanya?
Berdosa besar sangatkah kalau kau stand up for yourself?

Seorang kawan bercerita, kakaknya memang selalu tolong bab2 duit
Tapi dia selalu juga rasa macam pelik
Kalau datang ambil sendiri duit dari tangan kakaknya
Kakaknya akan make sure anak2 ada sama tengok dia berikan duit padanya
Or, cakap depan2 orang kenduri
"Ehh, kau kata tadi kau takde duit nak balik kan bla bla bla.."
Selama ni kawan ni diam saja dan telan semua

Satu hari, adalah bencana yang menimpa keluarganya
Kawannaku T tak mau lagi pergi mintak2 sesiapa
Tapi suami kakaknya yang bertanya
Mulanya T malas nak layan sebab dia ada udang sebalik batu
Dia nak elak berjumpa dengan abang iparnya, tapi nak datang rumah pulak hantar
Kawan ni bolak-balik tukar fikiran
Ish tak payah lah nak hantar2 ke rumah, transfer jer la
Dulu2pun macam tu
She questioned his motive
Tapi abg ipar ni dah cakap pasal fisabilillah bagai
In the end memang dihantar duit walaupun kawan ni dah sampai idung

Singgah pun tidak
Bagi pada anaknya saja
Kawan aku ni bercampurbaur dengan macam2 insiden
Memang terbakar
Beriya insisted nak hantar sendiri, ingat nak jumpa tanya kabar

Kawan malulah. Anak tanya, Mak pinjam duit ke?
Tak jaga air muka. Betullah selama ni. Kawan ni kata dia memang nak menunjuk.

So kawan ni confronted kakaknya. Dia beri contoh satu persatu, bila, siapa etc.
Kakak mungkin terkedu. Kata kawanku kakaknya twist things around kata T yang macam tak kenang budi. Suka² mengungkit..

Saya dengar cerita T dan ceritanya npak mcm tele dengan chronology keseluruhan. Contohnya, T tanya pada awal perceraian, T beraya dengan kakaknya, atas ingatan anak sulungnya. Tapi kakaknya memang nampak tidak berapa suka. Awal2 pagi selepas sarapan setelah meraung dalam bilik mandi atas layanan pagi syawal, T minta diri dan kakaknya tak nyempat² suruh anaknya kemaskan barang² T dan bawak beg²nya keluar. Langsung tak tahan. Langsung tak peduli. T tanya kenapa kakanya sampai hati buat begitu? Kata T, dia masih ingat senyum puas hati kakaknya! T pun bukan tak ingat Tuhan, tapi kalau kakaknya dah sanggup buat tak tau..T pun akan folowwww

Aku dah tak sanggup nak tulis lagi. Nak nangis rasanya. Nasib akupun lebih kurang sama. Tiap2 hari rasanya kot terima posting2 berunsur keagamaan dr adik beradik.

Anyway, hati kena jaga..

Satu lagi kawan, dia ni ada adik beradik yang memang kaya raya. Seorang kakak akan bagilah duit selepuk tak kurang rm10k untuk Raya pada adik beradik pompuan. Alhamdulillah.
Tapi komplen kawan saya ni, abangnya yang kaya berada ni memang tiap² minggu sedekah pada orang2 susah. Aku pun pernah terima waktu ex tak kerja, aku tak kerja! Tapi rupa2nya dia tak pernah bagi pada adiknya sendiri! Sebab adiknya susah, suami seorang bekerja gaji rm1500. Ikut kata dialah. Entahlahkan..

To me, bila dah buat salah, minta maaf je lah. Ngaku je kekhilafan sebagai manusia lemah. Tak payah nak melatah, cakap itu cakap ini. Yang simple to understand, kalau tolong dengan hati tak ikhlas, memang ada masalah..






Tuesday, January 19, 2016

Silence is golden...sangat OVERRATED!

OVERRATED!
Yea, that phrase might have worked a very long long time ago. In 2016? Hardly! Just like marrying 4.

Kita tau ujian itu, kifarah... Ehh tapi ada jer separuh orang, kalau kena kat orang lain, balasan dosa, kalau kena kat diri sendiri, a test from Allah sebab Allah sayang mereka - mana satu? Entahlah.

Anyway, jalan hidup kita berbeza²kan. Cara hadapi sesuatu situasi pun takkan mungkin sama! It involves upbringing, surrounding, circle of friends...pengalaman hidup. Of course, theres no question about it. Kecuali kau orang yang baru lepas lalui satu pengalaman yang bawak kau sujud pada Allah, melalak² sampai air² hingus bersememeh atas sejadah. Putus cinta salunya. Banyak hutang. Hilang orang yang dikasihi buat selama² nya. Cara masing²  tangani, hadapi ujian, berbeza². Yang ada orang tanggung bayarkan hutang, dah tentu² kurang beban kau dari orang banyak hutang dan kena pikir mana nak cari fulus nak bayar hutang. Tambah pulak kalau suami yang memang tak peduli kan kau! You see there are a whole long list of reasons, or call it excuses..it makes no difference because that's the truth. Situasi yang berbeza² tu yang buat sesetengah orang tangani masalah dengan cara berbeza².

The need to let IT out of your chest, memang macam air tengah mengelegak. Tapi ada orang yang kata sifat macam tu menunjukkan kau kurang beriman! Orang dah down low, lu lagi nak jatuhkan! Ive been there once. Memang rasa confused semacam. Macam saya ni orang yang tak solat. Macam saya tak kenal Quran penyembuh duka hati. Wahhhh, macam dia hampir2 taraf² malaikat gitu. Cakapnya gahnya. Segan dengar. Pergi sana sini semua mewah². Mungkin takut agaknya dia kena keluar duit. Memang tak pernah pun. Tak pernah mintakpun dengan dia. Eiii.

Aku sejak bercerai, memang tak berani meminjam² duit. Takut. Dulu masa ada suami, terpaksa.
Nak mintak tolong dengan adik-beradikpun tak berani. Malu giler. Aku pikir dorang tau keadaan aku, kalau dorang tak 'volunteer' haha bantu yang patut², since semua happy² je, maknanya dorangpun memang tak dapat bantu.

Aku ni memang panjang lebar menulis. Kadang² takde sorangpun yang faham. Aku harap ada lah yang faham, sebab penting korang ambik iktibar dari cerita ni. Bila datang seseorang kepada kau, jangan cepat judging he/she kurang iman, tak bersyukur, suka merungut sebab kehidupan kita berbeza². Mungkin hidup perfect kau buat kau rasa, eiii macam² lah masalah dia ni, merungut je.

Sebelum habih citer ni, meh aku citer kisah kenalan aku yang baru nikah laki baru. Dia ni dulu bersuamikan suami yang tak berapa boleh diharap. Pendekkan cerita. Masa bersama lagi, L dah ada boifren. Suami orang. MINTA TAHAN HATI DULU OK, INI BUKAN JUDGING, INI NAK BAGI CONTOH...... Haha sabarrrrr. So in the end L lepas dari suami yang kureng tu dan selamat berkahwen dengan boifren yang telahpun menceraikan isterinya.
Nak jadi cerita, reunion², mini ngeteh sessions dan macam² lagi,  terberceritalah kisah masing². Kawan aku mencerita kisahnya, suami nikah lagi satu, tak bertanggungjawab itu ini..
Wahhhh Che Puan L terus disapproved, as if our friend ni tak bersyukur lah! Lantang komen. L beri contoh "ex wife husband sebok kacau my husband mintak rumah, eiiiii"

Wow! Kau berfikir ke tak L??????????????
Kitorang figured, L ni terlebih hangen dengan kawan kitorang sebab tempias cerita our fren about bini no. 2. Terasa...
Ada satu pepatah tersekat kat tekak...adoiii
Apapun, dengan orang² macam L ni, seeloknya jangan buat silence is golden.. Bagi je seround. Bila jumpa, peluk² cium²...cuba² lah jaga silaturrahim seboleh mungkin..sedihnya.

Last but not least, kalau bertahun² kau dilayan lain macam dan kau rasa dah tak boleh diamkan diri, kau confront dan dia jadi defensive bila kau siap beri contoh...
betul kot apa yang aku rasa selama ni...?

Thursday, January 7, 2016

Voodoo Hoodoo Black Magic...

Im sorry people. I do this a lot, dont i? The disappearing act! Well anyway HAPPY NEW YEAR! Its still not too late. We are still in the single-digit-date of january! It started with a real 'bang' indeed, i must admit..

First, the Ex quit his job. Again.
Im not sure quite how to put it, but it seems to me that hes taking it easy.. As do his parents. Ohh..in Islam, if the biological father isnt capable to provide for the children, the next in line responsible is the grandparents, then the the childrens' uncle. Oh well, i am shocked that I have  nothing to say anymore..

Well so all plans must be rescheduled!

Yesterday an old friend chatted with me on WhatsApp. I thought a few times i caught her sending disturbing messages...about her marriage. I just ignored them thinking its just me, being distorted! Yesterday she spilt all. Well almost..Ok my friend N is wife no 2. So some went on saying things like serves her right for wrecking another woman's home. Life.

The creation of female species really was a catastrophy, (catastrophe whichever is your preference! Ya Rabb, blasphemy NOT INTENDED) remember Eve? I have written about how women should be sticking together instead of  chewing one another years ago. Maybe months!
Now why do you let the bastards (sorryyyyy. but it just seem so approriate at the moment) that youve been sharing your bed with..treat you just like an animal would, while mating, be in the same bathroom while youre peeing and seen the worst of you GET AWAY WITH THE FRICKIN' BETRAYAL??????? I fail to understand THAT! Im neither the 1st wife nor the 2nd! So may be i dont understand.

And yes, instead..we go after the woman who is after the same thing we were! Love. Security. In Islam, men are allowed to marry up to 4 at the same time. If you can and willingly spread dakwah and accept other Islamic values, why not this?

Again, i apologize. I can almost hear angry voices and see mad faces coming at me.
"It doesnt happen to you!"

Ok...lets go back to our voodoo hoodoo story. So N had been sick off and on, but never really told anyone outside her family. Thats understood.
Well, N had finally asked her husband to take her to a doctor but to my dismay he asked her to just wait. Like its nothing serious. By that time she was already bleeding. Constant fever. Her family took her to a hospital but they said everything was A-ok! N said she was already looking like a zombie! Her dad drove all the way up north to get rid of the evil spell. And so far shes looking and feeling better.

She used to get up in the middle of the night finding a really dark "man' sleeping beside her.. I hope its all over now for her!

A special prayer goes out to you..!

Well, this is definitely something worth taking heed to..