Monday, February 29, 2016

Mau dekat Kiamat sudaaa?

Aku just semakin rasa geli dan jijik dengan orang2..yang mengaku 'kawan yg boleh dipercayai'  'sedara yang paling murni'



AlKisah 1
Conversation dalam grup WatsAp pompuan...yang AKU CAKAP, di screenshot kan, bagi pada budak2 jantan. Aku joked about "alah apo lah yang ado kek Rantau, or Apa kelas Rantau tu...." yang beriya2 menjadikan hal besar, sorang budak Rantau yang entah hapa2, entah sapa2, mengviralkan screenshot yang dihantar oleh 'kawan' pompuan bertudung labuh ni, pada kawan yang pernah rapat dengan aku dulu, tanyanya pada U, "orang macam ni ke you buat kawan? Menghina kampung?"
Gua orang Sogo lah Mat, aku lebih senang cakap n9 dari english, apa yang menghina sangat??? It was clearly a joke, but orang hati jahat dan busuk akan cari hal jer..

Hmmmm.. "kami ni kawan you, kami bukan macam dorang, kami faham keadaan you........."
Pastu aku caught dia red-handed mentalam-dua-mukakan maruah dia. Rasa sedih pun ada. Menyampah lagilah banyak. Mcm despret bena nak jadi fofular cam zaman2 sekolah dulu?
Apa kena-mengena dengan Kiamat pulak nihh?

Kan bila semakin dekat nak Kiamat, orang2 yang nampak alim, jadi terbalik sikapnya. Yg aku ceritakan ni, adalah dr grup wanita2 pada amnya solehah, tapi terikut2 sangat napsu dan hati. Cakap2 mereka, banyak memalukan orang2 lain.
"Eh rambut kau teruk lagi tak macam dulu2?" Tanya depan khalayak ramai. 'Kawan' ni tersinggung gila. Kalau aku, aku tak peduli, sebab dari dulu aku memang salu kena ejek, kehkehkeh. Tapi 'kawan' ni sensitif tentang penampilan! Yang bertanya pun, tengok2lh cermin, 'kawan' tu suruh tolong pesan...
Saya hanya menyampaikan pesan..
"Hazam, nak guna kusi usopwilcha tak pergi sana nanti?" Sebelum2 ni tk penah rasa aku nak bercakap2, tetibe depan2 orang ramai tanye itu macam punye soklan. Termalulah jugak den. Apa motif sebenarnya tu?
Ofkoz memang ada yang truly genuine...I know that! Tapi lebih ramai yang takkk.

AlKisah 2
Aku kenal dia ni memang dah lama. Baru2 ni bersama2 semula kerana dia kini berada di kawasan yang sama. Mmg best. Sbb dia jovial, lawak. Satu hari Chah was with her (shes sending Chah to school sebab dia ada kat rumah aku waktu tu) and needed to call her friend, pinjamlah fon aunty. Mula2 Chah confused, but terus cakap,
"Emm hello, Abah?" Aku pun pelik. Aku tanya kenapa call, dia explained knpa dia call. Then months after, aku pulak nak pinjam fon sebab fon aku tkde bateri. Her daughter ambilkn fon dan tolong carikan kat contact list..
"Takde pun number Aunty?" She turned pale. Paused. Then told her to go to Y!
Anak dia pun konpius!
"Kenapa ibu letak nama Uncle? Kalau ayah nampak macamana?"
Aku terus buat2 pandang luar tingkap. Then she answered, because that was Uncles number dulu. That number has been mine dari day 1, never yein's.
Then kepelikan aku sebelum2 ni, terungkailah satu-persatu. Ohh, dia srmakin pelik, dan mula ada sikap, tetiba datang or call aku, mcm sesebelum ni takde apa2 yang berlaku. Like, what the heckkkkkk, mana kao pegi selama ni, aku WA, sms biasa, fon ko tak respond??????? Tetiba ko muncul cam....yesterday we met, had fun, and today I think we should frickin do it again!!!!!
WHAAAAAA...?
Adalah tewwwwww isu yang besarrrrrrr yang tak nak dikongsi!
Haa, kalau dengan aku tu, pandai nak tauuuuuuu lah jugak setiap butiran, sampai ke bekas laki den pun dicari. Anak2 aku pun kao tepon.
Banyak benar hal2 pelik dia ni, seperti kawan2 hubbynya tepon dia malam2, tanya husband you dah balik keja, or dah tido ke, ATAUKAH yang dikatakan kawan2 suami itu adalah nama2 suami kawan2nya...macam dengan kes aku, dia register nama my x-husband for my number? Apa kes tu? Macam kata anaknya, kalau laki dia baca..
"Miss you beb.." kehkehkeh, ha! ha! tak tauuuu!
Kawan kitorang U, pernah kata mungkin hubby tak pedulikan dia sangat since dia ada affair dulu, so dia letak nama2 lelaki...yakni husbands kawan untuk tunjuk, yang dia masih laku lagi...?  Tak tercapai dek mindaku..

AlKisah 3
Ini jugak antara kisah paling aku tak paham motifnya. Start dari mula yeh. Masa mula2 bercerai, aku dengan x memang bitter. Everything was, actually. I felt so alone, takde adik-beradik nak mengadu. Dah dorang memang tak kata apa. My divorce was probably the greatest insult to them. After months I told myself, my children and my x that things have got to change and its gotta be really fast. My children were drifting apart faster than I could ever imagined.  So aku berbaik2 dengan x. Tak lama lepas berbaik2, aku sedar, x masih tak berubah. Masih berenti kerja ikut suka2 dia.
So waktu ni lah x kenalkan aku dengan classmate dia dulu, L namanya. First time aku dengar pasal L masa tu dalam kereta. L called (Haaaa, sekarang baru aku teringat balik semula...)  aku ingat suara x tetiba je cam, lembut romantis pulak. Ber 'dear'2 gitu. Aku tau, sekarang ni memang ada certain women, men yang panggil kawan2 dia Dear, but its so strange hearing him calling a friend Dear. Tak tau lh, rasa guilty ke (sebab masa tu sebok ajak nikah balik kan....hohoho) atau kemalu-maluan ke, sebab terperangkap dalam jerat sendiri..dia sukarela menceritakan about L. L pun ibu tunggal, lakidia suka main pompuan. OK so macam tu lah kitorng kenal dengan L. Lepas tu, dari dengar2 cerita pasal dia, kami jumpa. Dia datang rumah, bawak makanan untuk anak2. Selalu jugak. Kadang2 sampaikan duit zakat, sedekah dari kawan2, kesiankan anak2 sebab I ni sakut dan bapaknya suka2 kerja, suka2 tak kerja. Bila kawan2 ber-reunion, happy keluar, ngikut saja. Satu hari, L came by, and a fren C ada sama, so kita bercerita about what an idiot our mutual fren is, dan menyusahkan. L beriya2 menyatakan mutual fren ni baik. Dengan dia. Mutual fren ni sebenarnya memang kaki belit, ada beberapa kawan dah kena. Pendekkn cerita, lepas insiden ni, aku tak pernah nampak batang hidung L lagi. Bila watsap pun, cepat2 kata dia sibuk. OK lah dah 2, 3 kali kita tegur, tanya kabar dia buat macam tu, aku pun biarkan je. One day, x ajak pi makan kat kedai kawan dia dengan all his successful friends...yang selalu tolong dia. Masa jumpa yang girls, ada yang tengok aku semacam. Macam, "Ah, takde lah sakit uzur mana pun, masih boleh berjalan2 ikut makan2....melawa" so macam dorang terperanjatlah, ingatkan teruk sangatlah! But sapa yang kata teruk sangat tu? Kawan korang sendiri lah kot, coz aku tak pernah bercakap2 dengan korang!  Tijah tertipu?? Anyway, they all expected L to join, tapi last minute changed her mind. Sebab aku join ke? Entah. Bila aku tanyax, dia bersungguh2 kata dia takde apa2 pun dengan L, lagipun katanya L ada boyfriend, orang besar. Tapi ke mana pegi berdua. Tengah2 malam nak berurut, nak tengok kawan sakit, cari x. Nak belajar bawak motor pun x yang ajar, hahaha! So, lepas tu, tak dengar apa2 dari sapa2 until Raya the next year. Ls supposedly 'best friend' came alone. Dia pun ceritalah how L treated her strangely (reads: meanly..) kalau B tetiba datang join ngeteh, L would suddenly ada hal, then blah and macam2. OK ni cerita aku, in between sunyi sepi etc ni, aku dengan C satu pagi ke tesco s2 nak breakfes claypot chicken rice. Aku nampak dia dari jauh dengan anak lelaki. Dince dia dah lama mengelak2 nak bercakap dengan aku, aku pun takdelah kisah nak tegur. Dia pun dalam beriya2 tutup2 muka, ikut jugak anak dia dari jauh2 tadi, sampai selang 1, 2 meja dari aku. Terbongkok2, menyorok2 muka. Sakit ati jugak den..kalau dah tak nak aku nampak sampai cover2 muka, kenapa gi duduk kat meja mengadap aku! Lepas insiden ni, aku tak denfar apa2 dari sapa2 macam biasa.
Then entah ribut mana dragged an old friend into the picture, maybe Oct 2015 kot. D knows Ls boyfriend. Terkeluarlah balik semula cerita L ni.
Cerita dia kata aku ni sebenatnta srhat walafiat, tegap berjalan. I suppose she was referring to the time she met C and I kat tesco sebab I guna trolley berjalan. Dah boleh berjalan, dan aku akan selalu cuba berjalan, kalau tak sakit. Dan macam2 lagi.
So her telling friends macam tu, created a different story pulak. Macam I ni menipu dan ambil kesempatan. Sapa yang salu dengan kau L, yang tak bekeja mintak tolong duit macam2? Aku ke? Aku ke, mamat yang ajar kau bawak motor? Reality check, please!

AlKisah 4
Aku pendekkan je. Tabiat kebayakkan orang jantan yang pengecut, tak puas hati dengan layanan dalam bilik, pastu nak ambil kesempatan dengan karipap lain, akan buruk2kan isteri. Katanya rambut isteri dah penuh beruban! I adked myself, So????? Umurnya pun dah 50an! Isteri takmo 'daulat tuanku, menyembah duli' buat rasa macam pengemis, padahal semua dia nak, I bagi. Tapi kalau dah lenguh2 rahang,try tanganpun sampai rasa naik kembang lengan, apa cerrrrr? Erectile Dysfunction. Ajak aku pulak mentang2lah aku MakJanz, barang expired pun agak2 dia aku ni despret, sanggup ajer. Masalahnya, ni orang yang dalam fb, tak betul sikit, ini bukan sikap orang islam, yang pergi surau tiap2 malam, tapi ajak buat maksiat dengan aku ni yang dah macam adik sendiri. Aku simpan mesejnya yang menjijikkan di email so satu hari kalau dia cakap bukan2, aku email je pada si isteri.
Jantan2 macam ni memang barua besar! Aku kurang adab dengan orang yang takde adab! So if his daughter is reading this, tell your perverted father to be extremely careful...

So... MEAN people ni exist. Your own flesh and blood, people you trusted your life with macam abang kandung, old friends, your ex-soul-mate yang kau ingat kawan sampai mati walaupun tak tido sekatil lagi, yang kerjaya professional,  yang educated, yang islamic bukan main, yang anak ustaz macam L ni, yang dalam FB,  Twitter IG kalau join, macam kelab agama, penuh dengan nasihat, hadith, petikan ayat2 Quran...aku memang tak percaya orang2 macam ni. Suka kata, "orang2 macam I ni, memang ujian kitorang tinggi dan mencabar.." Uwekkkkkkk, please lah..!
Semoga korang berjaya memerangi syaitan dalam diri sendiri tu dulu...

Tuesday, February 16, 2016

Aging gracefully..

I used to complain about how oily my skin was.
Today, at 47, I am blessed with this face - wrinkle and line-free. Well..honestly, ALMOST WRINKLE AND LINE-FREE!
I do not owe it to my oily skin.

Oily face damaged a whole lot of things - open pores would remain on the number 1 spot, eternally. Breakouts!!!!! Blackheads, Whiteheads - yucksss. I know some even experience uneven skin tone..pigmentation, especially on the cheeks  right?

With all those in tow, its a wonder one could age peacefully!
Especially with stress at work. Natural contributors - Idiots as 'friends'. And husbands too (Well.. to some extremely great strong wives! ;-)  ) They contribute to deep creases. Im serious. Those are the two that I still have - tu yang tak jadi completely 'wrinkle and line-free' tu. Deep creases are really bad! Aaaand, they are diminishing, those 2 creases were from yearsssss back!

I believe my lines aint showing darlings, because I am continuously getting help from my new best friend.
Let me tell you this...if ever you complimented a lady saying her skins gojesssss, flawless, youthful, dewy....and she said shes doesnt take any kind of collagen, nothing at all - shes lying! Shes just not sharing her secret. End of story.

Ok here it is, cards on the table. Imagine bad skin half of your adult life.
Open pores. Pigmentation. Constant breakouts. Yadaa, yadaaa.. I have tried way too many products that didnt work. Worst, made my skin even oilier, hence bigger pores. Oil free moisturizer. Oil-free 2-way cake. Cleanser for oily skin. Toner for oily skin. And along came the collagen fever. Some didnt even work! Some halted my mensus. Some were meant only to whiten the skin. I dont want to look like a corpse! No way. I saw a singer who transformed herself, well her skin, into pale white - shes scary.

I dont mean to be MEAN but...wouldnt you want to just turn fairer, in rosie shades, instead of turning pale white? Brighter healthier skin instead of blinding white?

At 47, only a bottle, #LumineSkinn tightens my pores.
Afterall these years! Imagine THAT!
Remember this - open pores wont completely close-up.
#LumineSkinn reduced the visibility of MY open pores, making MY skin looking almost smooth and flawless.

Now, I could just lie and make up a make-believe-story by saying my skin is flawless today, but no - THINK about this, if years of skin issues is fixed, at a safe, steady rate with clinically proven results - NO harmful side effects, then #LumineSkinn should be your new BFF!

I am so comfortable with #LumineSkinn (OK, comfortable is a huge word, really. In a relationship,  you know youre safe, loved and being taken care of...when you feel comfortable) thats the beginning of a great thing! So much so, when I witnessed the changes in my skin, I wanted to be one of its Agents. But, thank God, I realized soon enough that I cant sell. I cant sell tangible stuff.  I cant sell ice to Afrikaans. Let alone the Eskimos. Nobody would buy from me! Im sharing this with you just because some people might think that Im  just someone being paid handsomely to write about a product!

I feel great, but not just because my skin looks better now, but because I have shared this with you. It does good to my soul. Maybe somebody out there would like to give his or her skin another chance with #LumineSkinn ?

Life is about making the right choices. Ive narrowed down your options to #LumineSkinn






Aging gracefully with LumineSkinn

Why... Hello

I have confessed that Ive made seriously, stupid, stupid mistakes in the past.

When my sister Z talked about moving on etc, she suggested that I join an internet dating club, then start dating. After much consideration.... considering Im not even interested in looking, I rejoined a dating site. Asiandating.com I think. Z advised to join a few, but I was finding it troublesome to manage even one! I hate going to check 26 messages, all asking for a sex video chat. No genuine men, for friendship. After a few weeks or probably months, an old man in KL wrote to me. Hes 74 I think. But looked like hes 90. I laughed at first, then I thought, hed probably die on the first date hearing me laugh! So I wrote back. But thats the end of this old man! And I quit the site for the 3rd time!

Ive been an on-off Skype user for years. Skypes mostly for work. And because Im uses Skype too. I never really like Skype. After the X decided to quit his job again, I decided its time to install skype AGAIN! Just after 2 days, I got a message from someone I dont know. He looks like a straight-Boy George, with so much less make up...maybe....nick rhodes? LOL ok Im allowed to be mean ... depending on circumstances. Whatttt? You guys do that!

The message says, john richmond would like to get to know you..., ORRRR SOMETHING LIKE THAT, ok?
I wanted to just say something like...
"Why...???"
But I only managed a "why...."
Then its supposed to be...
"Why.."
"...would you want to get yo know me?"
But my stupid fingers typed..
"Hello."
Which made it sounded like Im thrilled..
"Why, hellooo.."

Ohh norrie!
Why...?

Hello..What were you thinking?

(And that guy too went quiet! My poor love-life! Guess I wasnt meant to be in love, cuz when Im in love, I really love! No man on earth can love me back..haha)


Monday, February 15, 2016

I cant be all wrong..

I have been busy.
Nothing huge, just the normal translation..subtitling etc
Theyre always urgent, and they pay cheaper than peanuts! LOL. But like a pariah, Id take them since X is in the matket, not working again! ..most men get mad at my writing, well give me just one good reason (just one good enough reason to shut the hell out of my stupid mouth..) the company he was working for, selling luxury cars and bikes. They shutdown the Sales and Marketing department (whaaaaaaaaatttt???????)
Yes they did. Then before a curse could escape my mouth, I was informed that he was offered a job with a sister company, but refused to accept due to its bad reputation...with salary. Whats wrong with just taking it first? Its been almost 5 months...

I noticed one thing about myself now, I hate trying.....to make small talk with people!
Its nice to have lots of nice friends - nice friends!

I have only a few.

So, when I told you that I wont be able to make that breakfast date EVERY TIME YOU invited, please know that thats my way! Ive been saying no politely..
When I dont answer your phone calls, thats my way .

Grouchie, you taught me well, thank you.

So, YEA, im going to be 47 in May.
I cant be all wrong..

Wednesday, February 3, 2016

I didnt know that...

Sheperd's Pie filling is made out of lamb. Lamb only!!!!
I always think that its a matter of your 'personal' preference! .. Macam buat Tom Yam, takmo seafood  hokey, ayam saja....haaa!
Yea apparently Sheperds Pie is made out of Lamb. Yes.

Anyway, so we had that the other day. But it wasnt lamb. We used beef, Im sure it would have tasted a lot better with lamb. Alhamdulillah nonetheless!
One of the pies was baked in my old beat up cake tray cuz I broke the usual casserole dish just a few minutes before throwing it into the oven..

The 2nd tray was purposely left longer for a more crispier topping and its really gooooooood!


And brocollis selling cheap! We love stir fry  buttered broccoli and garlic! Or... Is it broccoli in garlic infused butter? We especially love crispy garlic fried in butter! Just THAT and nothing else - no prawns. No beef strip. Nothing! Heavenly! Sorry though, we forgot to snap one of the famous delicious broccoli! 

People in Malaysia would think this is an expensive dinner..its not! But it sure was a great one, and my children are happy. :-)  :-)  :-) 









Tuesday, February 2, 2016

..of my recent absence

I have been missing, again..
Partly due to work commitment. Then some personal stuff that needs to be attended to..  Then its my health issue. Well more to period cramp that is.

It gets worst, the older I get. The recent one got me curled up in bed for almost 72 hours. It started on the 4th day, feeling dizzy with tummy upset; 5th day, all hell breaks loose, 6th day still the same. I could barely stand up straight. It felt like ... I had just given birth to another boy, haha (altaf had to be induced, i wasnt dilating! AT ALL! After a few hours, still not opening, they increased the Pitocin drip...ohh when it finally started it felt like I was going to explode!) giving birth to Altaf was 10/10 the period pain - 8.5/10

Maybe its universal, when a mother experienced great pain in labour, we believe that the mother had done something so wrong! Like not treating her husband right?

What is it like if a husband doesnt treat his wife right? The way of the Quran?